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The Preacher

The man with the sunglasses rises above

The student-and-teacher horizon as he postulates himself

Onto the podium.

He grabs a textbook and opens the pages

And flips through Chapter Thirty

With dirty fingers that dare blacken the whiteboard in the back

With his words.

I’ve heard that he never carries a cane or whip

To drive out uneducated savages from his scholastic chapel,

But that he flogs each and every academic heretic

With a lash of his sharp tongue.

They and their teachers repent, and his and his own God’s wrath is satisfied.


The man on the podium gestures for the wind to keep calm

And to silence his opposition.

He speaks with a voice that could shatter

Diamonds to dust

And bring the mighty down to their knees.

“Please, be quiet,” he commands like a magnificent magistrate.

“And hear me now as I preach these

Words of Wisdom to you,

Lest you forget what I mean.


“You see,

Words of Love bring Life,

Words of Hate bring Death.

Through thousands of millennia,

Language has been the majestic medium

In which we, as human beings,

Could communicate

To the sane and the insane

Our main thoughts and feelings to each other

And other mortals.

When we have first built our Towers of Babel,

We fell from great heights because

We have never considered how important

Speaking, Listening, Reading, and Writing were

To uniting with the Divine Order.

We have been oppressing ourselves with our own linguistic and literary ignorance,

And have dragged Reason, Plato, Confucius, and Greatness down to the

Ten-Thousandth level of Hell.

The Devil is laughing at us

As we wage war with each other

And grow to hate one another

Because we were born with different tongues.


“My brothers and sisters,

Intercultural communication is not

National degradation,

Nor compensation for our self-loathing and goading of others,

Nor emancipation for ourselves from mental slavery

To find that pot of gold

On the other side of Sugar-Candy Mount McKinley Mauna Kealoha.

It is spiritual regeneration

Through the transcendental meditation

Of memorizing and galvanizing the most Direct and Indirect Methods

Of Grammar Translation Theories,

Making Love through Language Learning

And Taking Love through Language Teaching.


“If that sound like a mouthful of words worthy of

The Pyramids of Giza and the

Great Geezers that sleep in those

Valleys of the Venerable Scholars,

Then do as the Romans do

And lend me your ears.

Language lifts us up to mountains that top even the highest summits on the planet Mars.


But as deep dark trenches scar the bottoms of the big black seas,

Language leaves the mark of a once great and powerful Oz

Or some other grand civilization akin to it.

As books burn, so do the words within and without them,

And there is no pleasure in watching them turn into

Ashes to ashes,

Dust to dust.


“And as the voices of the last speakers and semanticists

Are silenced and lay still forevermore,

May their hallowed graves and gloomy vigils

Stay silent as a warning

To the tilting and toppling heresies of eradicating language.”


The Preacher fell silent,

And as he closed his book and walked off the academic altar,

The words cut through me and my fellow students and teachers deeply

Like a whiplash.




Note: This is the first draft of a slam poem I wrote a while back under my real name.

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